I am a bad mom, are you?
By Madhurie Singh, August 18, 2009
Ask my sons between mom or dad who is good or bad?
And within a fraction of a second they will tell you it’s their mom who is BAD :(!
Earlier I used to be hurt. I would get even mad at them and make them sit and understand how I am a good mom. Poor me. π
As if they want to know that from ME ! Don’t they have their own judgement?
Now its been a couple of years now since I have given up on making them register that I am a good mom, like their good papa !
But occasionally I itch to find out if any small feeling towards me has changed. π So, I asked my sons again the same question but in a different way. ( MBA degree has not gone waste :)) And this was while watching the movie “Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic” just after the parents of the four kids pass away in the movie.
First I asked my elder son, making sure the younger one was not around.
I asked him ” What if something like this happened to me, would you like it?”
My elder one is very sensitive and hugged me instantly. Then without looking at me he , ” Thank God papa will be there. But mumma I will not like it without you!” π π Well I was sad and happy.
Then I called my younger son. I asked him the same question.
He said with a big smile, ” Bad mummas should !”.
I asked him why does he think that I am a bad mom.
“Because you scold me, you make me eat food, you put soap on my head, you make me sleep early, you shout when I shout and you love bhaiya more than me ” … Phew !!!
Well this was asking for more than I was prepared ! Meanwhile my elder son had entered into the room again. He said ” If mumma doesn’t scold us, we will become bad boys. And then other people will scold us and hit us when we are alone. And when we grow up like papa, no one will talk to us.” π Now I bless my son for understanding my role so well.
I really do not know how much was my younger one satisfied by this answer, but he just left to play.
As usual I started looking for him after 8:00 pm in my society. All the watchmen I asked, said he was nowhere to be seen for quite some time! My heart sank !
I called up the main security officer and told him to make sure he did not go out of the society. Then I rushed to get my elder one who was alone in the house, waiting at the door. When I reached home, I found my son and his friend with mud all around their clothes and bodies. Both the boys had scratches on their arms and legs. Relieved to see them safe, all my concern transformed into anger. But before I could utter a word, my younger son took out hundreds of flowers and leaves from his pockets, and placed the crushed flowers into my palm. Then he reached into his friend’s pocket too and pulled out few more flowers.
I opened the door and silently sent both into the bathroom.
After washing up his friend, and while washing my son, it seemed as though he was waiting for me to either scold him or shout at him. But I was too emotional to ask him anything.
At night my husband too got the cute surprise when I narrated him this incident. So he asked my younger one, as to why did he go in to the garden and bruise himself.
” Because mumma has to be a bad mom, so that we are good boys.” I saw his face quivering up trying to control his tears.
The price of disciplining is not bad π
really,each mom can feel the pain more then her kid feel,,,n believe me every time i slap my baby ,i m full of tears but act as kindless.
Thanks Rajshree, I am not a big fan of hitting but I do know at times it acts best.
very emotional but u know I m a very good mom for my 3 yr old.i even slap him but now I m confused that is it really bad to be good.
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