Rape and molestation versus safety and insensitivity

By Madhurie Singh, December 24, 2012

Pepper Spray, source google images
Pepper Spray, source google images

Every year, a few weeks before the NEW Year’s eve, India unites. No not peacefully but as a protest to fight or take up the fight for those victimized in rape, molestation, eve-teasing or such heinous crime.

Why do we wake up only when the mishap has happened?

That’s like the typical Indian mentality which is now a  genetic disease. We wait and wait, till it happens. Then we wake up, shout, cry, unite, get false assurance and then forget.

If you want to be safe, you have to pre-empt these situations and prepare yourself, mentally and physically.

You cannot wait for someone else to take this safety measure for you and your family. Definitely not the government!

I smile when every year around the same time emails pour in for Self-Defense workshops. This could be a new year bonus that you can get or give to someone who is exposed to the various risky situations.

A few tips that I will share for the benefit of the readers from my Self-Defense workshop.

  • Choose the time, place and opponent if you want to be safe.
    • I was given this wonderful teaching by an Army personnel, who claims that this is one of the first of the many lessons taught to them in the Armed Forces.
    • Let’s take the learnings from the current incident of the Delhi rape case.Choose the place, person and the time to fight. Just like you will want to be 100% ready before you make a business presentation with numbers, laptops and the right audience along with your colleagues to support you when you falter.
      • If you know you will be working late night, get your own vehicle or ask someone to pick you up whom you trust well.
      • Avoid getting into any kind of argument when you are alone in any kind of enclosed, publicly invisible place.
      • Think of the after effect of each step you take, before creating it ruckus or being part of it.
      • As soon as possible call the police. They are helpful. 🙂
      • Use your senses to keep cool and avoid anything which will lead to any argument unless it’s day time and in complete public view.
      • When you see that you are out numbered, it’s dark and no one can see the whole incident and when you know that these goons are inebriated state, keep low.
      • Yes, you will have to step in if something of this sort is already happening to someone else. This time you cannot keep cool but have to help the victim by calling the police of the family who will call help. Keep mobile phone on.
    • Stupids jump into brawls or cause brawls. The smart ones will assess and then pick up an argument.
    • Be confident and look confident. We carry the world in our purse, as the cliche goes. But do we really carry something that is really worth carrying, like a pepper spray! A pepper spray can be used to keep 10 people away safely as compared to a revolver which has only 6 bullets and will kill. Is 500/- such big investment?
      • Most victims are those who are walking with their eyes low, they squeeze their body tense, they clutch their purse tight and walk with no clue of who is around them.
      • Then there are those who are not tensed, not low in confidence but are oblivious to the world as they are engrossed in their mobile phone conversation. Better than the above situation though.
      • Then there are those who walk like the confident queens, making eye contacts with everyone, aware of the people around them, keep a mental tab on roads, lanes, shops which may be subconsciously getting registered to bring them a safety zone.
      • Now imagine who will be picked by the culprits. 🙂
    • Self Defense is not learning only martial art and thinking you have become a Jackie Chan or a Jet Lee.  It’s the art of practicing to wriggle out of any grip, hit on the vital points of the opponent and run for the safety. Even if you have learnt any of the forms of martial art, do not wait to see the reaction after you hit your opponent.  Escape from that situation to a safe area.
    • If you wish to attend the Self Defense workshop or have a workshop for all the ladies in your workplace, click here.

Thank you very much for the information. I agree with u that instead of being depend on police or someone to help oneshud always try to be out of such situation.

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