Making right choice is not easy but not impossible!
By Madhurie Singh, April 17, 2011
I am very very pleased today with my helper at Superindiankid. She did what will change her life and my belief.
My activity center is a place where we encourage kids participating in various activities out of their own will. We have parallel 4-5 activities in various rooms and kids actually get to choose what they want to participate in. We encourage but do not force anyone. We help but will never do their activity just to please parents. I actually offered to refund a parent who though her 3 year old did not do anything substantial on the first day of the camp. I had a choice. I could have lied to her and produced something more complex that was not done by her son, or stick to Superindiankid’s motto, that we build happy champs.
There are experienced and budding trainers who are very good and busy with their work. They come and get paid for the work they do. I have found that younger trainers are more into reality than the older ones when it comes to the new ways to training kids. But then the experienced ones know how to handle kids.
At Superindiankid, small kids who are not toilet trained are not enrolled obviously. And if they do the moms know the condition.
The helper at Superindiankid is not a maid. She helps me and the other trainers. She helps the kids to get comfortable and maintains the center.
This morning I had was put in a situation by a persistent mom. She was not going to leave without admission for her son. All was fine except that he was not toilet trained as per the timing we have the camp. True kids are kids and I wish I could help her. But we do not want to lose our focus too.
(May be we will be better equipped soon.)
I did not want my helper to be turned into a maid. I have been trying to put into her head the importance of educating herself and joining higher studies after her school which she finished recently.
Taking my support and advice she has joined a computer course too.
Here I was trying to move her ambitions high, but I did not want to decide for her. I wanted the helper to take a call for her own life with her own open mind, not because I told her.
So when the mom offered to pay extra money to the helper, to take care of the toilet situation for her son, I literally crossed my fingers under the table, hoping she said no. It would have been an easy task for everyone, had I ordered her to do what I wanted. But I knew if I let her take money today, she will never grow to what I am planning and hoping for her. I can see her talent that needs to be honed.
My helper looked at me, wanting a cue. But I wanted this decision to be entirely hers. It would prove so many things to both of us.
Number one would have been the winning of my countless lectures on how to keep educating, learning things and maintain self respect and not running after money.
The second was on how she could make a choice which will be best for her future. I have told her always and I myself follow this rule strictly. Before making any choice, I ask myself, after 10 years, how it will affect my life. And after I am gone, how will this choice affect my kids and their kids. Trust me; this process never fails me in making the right choice. And after I get my answers and I make a choice, I stand by it come what may. More than many times I am alone initially.
The third thing to be proven was her ability to choose good future life over present short term monetary gain.
She looked at me with her bright white teeth. I smiled back.
Then she shook her head and said sorry!
I was more than happy to refund the camp fee to the sad mom. But somehow I could see that even she was happy with the decision my helper took.
My helper helped me win today. I feel proud of her and I can guarantee if she is around she will turn out to be a fine trainer with Superindiankid one day. She decided to change her life for good and won my admiration.
Hi Madhuriji, This is regarding getting kids toilet trained as you touched in your topic. My son is two years and nine months old is not trained and seems like he just doesn't want to get trained. I want to put him in the nursery but am worried how things would work out. He see's his sister going to school and wants to go too. Also another thing is how would the schools react, as we are new in Pune. We shifted just 2 weeks back from US. Any inputs will really help. One more thing, what would be a good idea right now putting him in a school which caters specifically to his age group or the regular school with nursery. Thanks and Regards HV
Hi HV???? kindly use real name. Ur query is good but kindly post this under good habits post for me to answer so that its easy for others to read relevant questions and answers under right post.
The ripple effect.....this is how change happens...great. I can imagine the satisfaction and joy you both would have got because of this.
Yes Manisha, I was over the top and I know this will be something I can be always proud of.
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